Ever read a quote and it hits ya’ right in the stomach?

Yeah, me too.

“October is about trees revealing the colors they have hidden all year. People have an October as well.”

That one got me.

After I stepped away from the “spotlight”…I learned that a lot of people around me were “October” people.

I have always kept a wall up because honestly, there always seemed to be an ulterior motive or other intention that wasn’t genuine. And the funny thing is, some people thought I was stupid…like I couldn’t see it.

The warning shot was always “let’s take a picture together so I can post it!” Now, viewers would post a picture and that was something different. But the “October” people would always write something like “Hanging with my girl.”

People like that never knew ME.

People like that can only see a name.

I gotta call it like it is (pardon if this comes across as sounding egotistical because that is not my intent)…

BUT…

There were people who wanted to be around me because of my name.

There. I said it.

They are my “October” people.

In my TV days, one of my “October” people would always say this “We really need to grab some lunch or coffee soon!”

I see that person from time to time now. Just the other day I said, “Hey, we need to have that coffee soon!”

Crickets.

Her calendar is suddenly insanely busy.

Ok I’ll be honest, I did not want to necessarily have coffee with this person because the only things I want in my life that are fake are lashes, spray tans and my hair 😉

I guess I wanted to test my theory of “October” people.

Sadly I was spot on.

But you know what? It’s a good thing. You have to weed those people out because those are the people who will be drilling holes in your boat instead of helping you paddle.

They’re often opportunists.

My circle is a small as a Cheerio but they are my WOLF PACK. They are my ride-or-dies. They are the ones who will listen to me for hours. They will call me out on my BS. They celebrate my victories. They understand that my job NOW…is far more important than any job I had reading the news. They tell me things I don’t want to hear. They get the fact that I’m not always able to attend everything. They understand my plate is super full. They’re the first ones there and the last ones to leave. They know the way to my heart is talking over some wine and chips & salsa. They don’t name-drop me.

They don’t care who the he** I am.

But they do care about my character…my integrity…what I stand for…whether I can laugh at myself…my honesty.

I’m not Amanda Goodman.

I am Amanda.

I have four kids…my house is rarely clean…I wear makeup only when I have to…anything with an elastic waistband is my MVP…I struggle with losing the baby weight…I tend to roll my eyes way too much…I pretend I can sing Whitney Houston while driving my car…I hate doing my hair in the morning…I don’t like it when people tell me to “calm down”…I love Botox and I have no problem admitting it…I scream like a mad woman at the TV during a Notre Dame or Eagles game…I know every word to a Biggie or Tupac song…I cry at church songs…I play basketball…I have been known to have road rage…I hate talking on the phone…I am Queen of the Instant Pot except for Sundays, then it’s homemade Italian food…I am a fan of Pinot Grigio…I speak my mind…I am fiercely loyal…I’m as real as they come…I quote Steel Magnolias every single day…I drive the Hot Mess Express…I’m not glamorous.

That’s who I am.

It’s no fun when you finally figure out who your “October” people are…

But it is liberating to let them go.